Friday, February 24, 2006

Bin Laden Captured

At this point, doesn’t it seem impossible that we’ll ever catch Bin Laden?  Like it’s only brought up as a slur against Bush, and not something that serious people contemplate?  I mean, if you went to Yahoo and saw the headline: Bin Laden Captured, would you believe it?  Wouldn’t it just seem too anachronistic?  Like being at a serious dance club that started playing Right Said Fred, and you’d be like “Where the fuck did that come from?”

And is it possible to guess at what would happen if we finally did capture Bin Laden?  This isn’t something that the Bushies even talk about anymore, so it almost seems like nobody would care.  But I suspect that they’d act as if Bush had done the job himself, and we’d never hear the end of it.  We could be talking about the economy or healthcare, and they’d just keep repeating how heroic Bush is and how us libs had been rooting for Bin Laden the whole time and how we were the ones who never wanted to talk about it.  

What about if we just found his dead body, and it was obvious that we hadn’t killed him?  Would that also count as a victory for Bush, or would that be a big letdown?  And would it make a difference if he died of cancer or some other natural cause, versus a betrayal from a fellow terrorist?  It’s my guess that the Bushies would rub it in our faces in either case, perhaps to even claim that Bush himself had created cancer simply as an anti-terror measure.  And after all, the fight against cancer is just sooo pre-9/11.

2 comments:

virgil said...

I think it would come down as something like, 'Bin Laden died of cancer because Bush had him on the run for so long. We could never actually catch him, because of other pressing business, but he had to run, run, run, and couldn't just come to Bethesda for treatment. The American People understand that the President was out on the frontlines on this'.
The only way the death of Osama doesn't work FOR Bush is if Bin Laden personally were to ride a nuke into the White House like some Jihadi Slim Pickens from Dr. Strangelove

debutaunt said...

Shhhhh. Don't tell anyone, but Bin is in the room next to me here at MD Anderson.

Miss you, bro