Monday, April 24, 2006

Superman for President

Regarding Roger Ailes’ suggestion of Bush being Batman, I have to say that I’d prefer Superman as President.  Not only would he save us the expense of Airforce One and gas-guzzling bulletproof limousines, but I fear that millionaire Bruce Wayne might be a tad too sympathetic to more taxcuts for the super-rich.  Plus, Clark Kent’s journalism background would certainly endear him to the media and help smooth his efforts at communicating his message.  

And sure, there’s the issue of Clark not actually being an Earthling, but I believe his commitment to the American Way more than compensates.  Besides, I seriously doubt that our Founding Fathers had extraterrestrials in mind when they came up with that rule; and probably just wanted to keep the pansy-assed Old Europe out of the Whitehouse.

But then again, I’ve always been biased towards Superman; so perhaps this is just my irrational partisanship rearing its ugly head again.  And I’d still pick Batman over Spiderman, who I’ve always seen as being kind of gay; though not in the homosexual sense.  

P.S. And for those without the good sense to know better: Yes, Superman is a Democrat.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Doc wrote:
And sure, there’s the issue of Clark not actually being an Earthling

Ah, but post-Crisis, Jor-El and Lara put their genetic material into the Birthing Matrix, which was then sent to Earth, and Kal-El was born upon landing outside Smallville, Kansas. Therefore, he was born in the US. The only problem is whether or not he's a "natural" born US citizen. Sure, he was born here, but from an alien Birthing Matrix. That's pretty unnatural.

You're probably remembering the pre-Crisis Superman, Kal-L, who was born on Krypton, and would therefore have some Constitutional problems.

Then again, DC Comics is in the middle of a huge reality-altering cross-over, so depending on how that shakes out, Superman's origin may be changed again.

Finally, you do realize that in the DCU, Lex Luthor was elected President in 2000, right? Naturally, he was a Republican.

Anonymous said...

The 2001 Superman Annual featured an alternate future in which Superman became President; there, the Supreme Court inspected the birthing chamber and determined that Superman was American-born within the meaning of the Constitution.

However, be it noted that in that story, Supes became the candidate as a last-minute fill-in for Pete Ross. Ross was Luthor's Veep in the story you mentioned -- so if Luthor was a Republican (which I don't actually recall being mentioned), then so was Pete and therefore so is Supes.

The Pre-Crisis Superman was a New Deal Democrat, but also not native-born.

Anonymous said...

you are Superman to me, dude.

Always

L said...

I think Ben Grimm would make the better President, and wars would be much more fun as every one would begin with President Grimm yelling out, "It's clobberin' time!" There's also the fact that he's day-glo orange which would cause a new fashion craze and help revitalize the economy. And Johnny Storm's sex life would be more fun than Billy Carter any old day. Besides, we already have a president who's thicker than a brick so why not go all the way and get one made out of rock, or whatever The Thing is made out of.

Anonymous said...

neuralgourmet wrote:
I think Ben Grimm would make the better President...

But is America really ready to elect a Jewish President?

Doctor Biobrain said...

Sorry guys, but out of respect for the deceased Christopher Reeve, I'm sticking with the real Superman. And yes, movies do trump their source material.

Anonymous said...

i too would vote for Superman, having grown up with all the different ones,all the way to "smallville". I find it interesting that the original comic series was done in times not unlike ours, today, sans the horrible holocaustic deaths of Jews, and homosexuals, as well! the similarity may seem vague to some, but we are also under the thumbs of a dictator (tho' many of us are squeezing the hell out of our sorry asses, to get out from under!) there are starving people in our own country, and there are people in the countries we are trying to 'liberate' that are dying unnecessarily.And it seems that when our country is in 'unsure' times, these legendary heroes pop up in movies or t.v. series----to give us hope? to keep us placated, or fooled into thinking our 'superheroe' will fly down and save us? well, i'm fooled and somewhat, in a tiny little corner of my brain, comforted by watching a superheroe 'save the day.' "here i come to save the dayyyyyyy, Mighty Mouse is on his wayyyyy..." we all want someone to rescue us, to save us, from the evil that threatens to destroy us, or our world, but really, isn't that heroe our 'ownselves'? perhaps. but it is soooo very tiring saving our 'ownselves', much less the whole fucking world!and if I were a christian, my superheroe would be J.C.Man, would it not? Superman, J.C.Man, hmmmmm,"verrrrry interesting, but very schtupid!" At any rate, I'd still vote for Clark Kent, though, I'd really like it to be Lois Lane, in disguise, as 'Superwoman'!! I guess the world isn't ready for a female superheroe to save the day...

Anonymous said...

I'd really like it to be Lois Lane, in disguise, as 'Superwoman'!!

Ultra Woman, if you go by the Lois and Clark episode in which she has Clark's super powers.

Incidentally, does anyone know if the Lois and Clark series ever established that Superman was a US citizen? He wasn't US born in their continuity.