Thursday, March 29, 2007

My Latest Attack Ad

Here’s an attack ad I wrote at Carpetbagger’s against fellow commenter L Boom, who questioned the legality of the radio attack ad against fired prosecutor David Iglesias.  Boom seemed to have the strange idea that private citizens who weren’t running for political office should be immune from attack ads.  Ha!  Needless to say, it’d be funnier if you read the original ad and Boom’s comment, though it’s obviously not necessary.  And yes, at this point, I’m just drunkenly wasting space:

L Boom wonders if it’s legal to create attack ads against private citizens who aren’t running for public office. But what he doesn’t tell you is that he himself is a private citizen who isn’t running for public office. Equally suspicious is that Boom brags about “insane Orwell territory” yet a perusal of any map shows conclusively that there is no such place. It was invented. By whom? By Boom (voices: BOO!)

And so before you listen to anything L Boom has to say, make sure to ask him the hard-hitting questions that he continues to squirm out of answering to this day. Like why he stopped beating his mother. And whether or not he enjoys it when he kills those little kittens. Non-mother-beating-kitten-killers don’t have trouble with those questions. Why does Boom?

Young children are dying senseless deaths every day all over the world. Meanwhile, L Boom deigns himself holy enough to ask pointless questions on the legality of attack ads against his ilk of illicit private citizenry who are screwing with America. He still can’t figure out why everyone hates him. C’mon Boom, isn’t it obvious?

(This ad paid for by The American Citizens Against Boom Committee)

Oh, and for the record, I have no idea who L Boom is or if it’s even a dude.  But when it comes to a good attack ad, it’s better not to know.

No comments: