Super Palin

Carpetbagger writes about how the McCain people are hiding Shadow President Palin away from the media and isn't letting her do interviews. And the idea is that she's still too unprepared to meet the press and that they've got to get her up to speed. And while that might make CB's liberal heart leap with joy, the truth is much more thrilling.

As I mentioned at Carpetbagger's post, the real reason Palin can't give interviews is because she's currently waterboarding Bin Laden in hopes of getting him to tell her where she can find his boss, the Prophet Mohammad. She found OBL in the bottom of a Pakistani spiderhole and used her ability to memorize other people's speeches to lure him out, so she could blast off both of his kneecaps with a moose rifle. And after she bandaged his wounds to prevent him from dying, he called her an angel and remarked that he now knows why his evil plans would never have worked: Because America had such resourceful women as Sarah Palin.

And did I mention that she's currently got both Kim Jong Il and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad caught in a love triangle fighting for her affection? It's true. They've already vowed to renounce their evil ways and join the Axis of Palin. Yes, she's that good.