Sunday, April 01, 2007

American Idol Rules

Hope this doesn’t give away too much of the surprise, but as it turns out, Bush gets away with it.  And I mean everything.  That’s the only way they can keep things from getting too predictable.  I mean, impeachment?  Whatever!  You can only impeach the guy that shouldn’t be impeached, and for a stupid reason too, or it’d be too predictable and who’d want that?  It’s much better to keep people on their toes and to do what shouldn’t be done.  Otherwise, what’d be the point?  It’s not like they’ve got a nation to run or anything.  This is all for our amusement.  Like American Idol for grownups.

Speaking of which, Edwards really needs to drop out of the race.  Sure, he might make a good president and everything.  But the whole wife thing is tacky.  I mean, what’s the fate of millions of people worth when his wife will die someday?  Even more so, how can I possibly live with myself if I voted for a guy with a tacky wife situation?  Much better for him to drop out and save the presidency for someone whose life is more convenient for me.  What he gained in pity points he surely lost in ick factor.  

Sure, I’d like to feel sorry for him.  But instead, I’ll just attack him and pretend that he brought my scorn down upon himself.  After all, I can only vote for someone who I’d like to have a beer with, and if there’s one person I don’t want to have a beer with, it’s someone whose wife will die.  I’ll stick with the immortals, thank you very much.  So my money’s on Sanjaya.  That guy will never have a wife who dies.  If only the presidential race had American Idol’s voting rules…

No comments: