To answer your questions, no, I didn’t really lose the most recent Carnival of the Liberals. I’m just boycotting them because they’re scum-sucking leaches who wouldn’t know a good blog post if it bit them in the ass. And so that’s why I refused to submit my best posts, but rather intentionally threw one of my more mundane bric-a-brac at them; intending to lose, so that their readers would know what a fraud the whole thing was. And that’s exactly what happened, as evidenced by their slumping readership. So in reality, I won. It’s that simple.
But it doesn’t end there. My lawyers forbid me from going into any more details, but needless to say, I’ll be owning that damn carnival by the end of March. And after that, I’m turning it into a parking lot.
Doctor Biobrain has spoken.