Some things are just too incredible to believe, and Carpetbagger's got one of them. Regarding the hostage rescue operation from FARC rebels in Columbia, CB writes:
Fox News, in an apparent attempt to make itself appear even more ridiculous than usual, told viewers that McCain’s visit to Colombia may have been related to freeing the hostages.
The claim is so absurd, even the McCain campaign wouldn’t make it.
Oh, please. Like we're supposed to believe that these people were held hostage for all this time and it's pure coincidence that they got rescued at the same time McCain happened to be in the country. Right. What's next, we're to imagine that the Iranians hadn't pissed themselves when they realized Ronald Reagan was their new arch-enemy, and were just tired of holding the hostages? Puh-leeze!
The reality is that people like Reagan and McCain come from an earlier, tougher generation which really knew how to deal with bad guys. And it wasn't by serving them tea and crumpets. It was about walking tough and talking tougher, and knowing that bad guys will pee themselves when they realize they're facing a tough walker-talker. And Senator John McCain is the toughest walker-talker we've got.
How He Walked Hard
And so what else can we imagine other than that McCain infiltrated the FARC camp in the dead of night, put a Bowie knife to the chief terrorist's throat, and told him to "Stop the bullshit." Oh yes, I know that's speculation. It might have been the real Rambo's knife, or possibly even a regular Ginsu he used as his steak knife on the way there. Who knows, the knife's not important. But we know McCain's a tough talker and already got a glimpse into his "Stop the Bullshit" method of dealing with bad guys. And that's got to be the case here, per Occam's Razor. If hostages get released at the same time John McCain is nearby, the simplest explanation is that John McCain freed them with a really big knife and some tough talk. There can be no other explanation.
And let's face it, John McCain is a humble man of humble origins and people of his generation never ever never like to brag. They may save the world from evil-doers, but it's all in a day's work. And so it's no wonder the McCain campaign hasn't tried to make some big hoohaw about all this, as it'd probably just embarrass the guy. Same thing with Reagan when he slipped into Soviet Russia after his presidency ended and personally defeated Communism by beating the Kremlin at arm-wrestling and a drinking competition (he also used the "Stop the Bullshit" line, but only after he defeated them). Sure, he could have bragged to someone about it, but that'd have only cheapened his victory. He did it for America; not personal glory.
And so that's what's really going on here. McCain even asked me to not say anything about it, but I really had to set the record straight after Carpetbagger smeared him so badly. Right is right, and if we can get a president who can fix every conflict in the world with a little straight talk and a big knife, perhaps we might think about electing one.