Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Negroes in Heaven

This is probably a stupid question, but shouldn’t Christian racists strive to keep black and Hispanic people from going to Heaven? Or are they happy with helping minorities find salvation? I’m in no way suggesting that most Christians are racist or anything. But of the Christians who happen to be racist, shouldn’t this be a real concern for them? That they’ll have spent all their lives keeping brown-skinned people out of their neighborhoods, pools, schools, and workplaces; just to find themselves stuck for all of eternity next to some darkie trying to play the blues on a harp.

Has that just never occurred to them? Or do they just assume that minorities can’t get into Heaven? Or do they think Heaven is segregated? And holy shit, what if they’re right? What if you got to Heaven and it was segregated by race. Wouldn’t you freak? Would you try to protest, or would you just go with it? And what if it turned out to be a test, which you failed by not protesting; and end up going to Hell? Wouldn’t that suck?

But back to the racists. I’m having trouble wrapping my head around this one. I’m sure they must have thought about it. They probably sit around their shitty little bars, drinking their shitty little beers, and having a good old laugh about whatever it is that they think the colored people have coming to them in the afterlife. But what could it be? Do they really think all the brown-skinned people go to Hell? Or might they believe that we’re all the same on the inside, and be perfectly happy hanging with the homies, once the skin comes off?

And what about from the other side? Can racists get into Heaven? And if so, how cool are the minorities in Heaven with all this? Do the racists have to give up their racist ways, or could they still be openly racist in Heaven? I’m sure there are quite a few racists who would not be cool with an integrated Heaven. Would God send them to Hell if they tried to create a Whites Only section of Heaven? And do you think Satan could possibly lure them down to Hell, were he to promise them it was segregated?

And finally, if racial inequality was rampant in Hell, would the Civil Rights leaders in Heaven stage protests and try to force God to end the racism? Presumably, he has power over the place; being omnipotent and everything. So would MLK expect God to create racial justice in Hell? Or do you think he’d just think that was all part of the punishment?

You have ten minutes to answer these questions. Good luck.

2 comments:

Fade said...

answered your ??? via yahoo answers. Great post...

Fade said...

Oh, If there's negroes or mexicans in Heaven, they'll be THE GOOD ONES! You know the type. Not those uppity ones...

And Heaven will have its gated communities within its gated community, if you know what I mean, wink nod nudge. Oh, shhh! Here comes one now...