Saturday, December 08, 2007

Huckabee Supports Ban on Religion

You know, I didn't like Mike Huckabee at first, but I'm really starting to warm-up to all the powers that he wants to give us. For example, look at this quote of his on the gay marriage issue:

"What people do in the privacy of their own lives as adults is their business," Huckabee said. "If they bring it into the public square and ask me as a taxpayer to support it or to endorse it, then it becomes a matter of public discussion and discourse."

Looks to me like he's saying that the rest of us get a say in who people marry. Excellent! I've always thought that there were certain people who shouldn't be married. Like dumb people. I'd prefer they not get married, and I definitely don't think they should be procreating. Now I guess if they want to get married and have kids in the privacy of their own lives and I never have to see these people together, watch their kids tramping around in public, or have to spend my hard earned money in a futile attempt to "educate" their brats; well I'd be fine with that.

But I absolutely refuse to have any part of this abominable practice of allowing dumbness to thrive in public. After all, I am a taxpayer and I don't want to support or endorse dumbness of any kind. Dumbness is a choice; a choice which my religion of secularism finds entirely abhorrent. So I'm glad to see that Mike Huckabee supports my right to deny these people the ability to inflict their lifestyle choices on the rest of us.

The Huckabee Doctrine Expanded

And let's not insult Huckabee's intelligence by pretending that his comment is only limited to marriage, or, as some might imagine, that this grand principle of his was only limited to gay marriage. Huckabee isn't one of those small-minded people who pretend to be standing on principles which, in fact, are only limited to the very specific moral preferences they want to see enforced. Hell no. Mike Huckabee is a man of principle who clearly intends for this doctrine of his to be applied throughout our society.

So if Mike Huckabee can win the Whitehouse, I'm sure we can look forward to a day where the general public has a say in all personal choices whenever they intrude into the "public square". Like if the taxpayers of New York City decided to make anti-gay churches pay property and income taxes. Or if San Francisco wanted to refuse to acknowledge heterosexual marriage. And surely he must agree with Washington D.C.'s firearm ban; a particularly brave stance coming from a conservative.

Let's see what else. We could extend this into outlawing Christmas, bibles, religion, sports, and even children. And all with Mike Huckabee's complete approval. Because he respects the rights of taxpayers to decide what goes on in public; even things that the public never actually sees. And all based upon Mike Huckabee's principle of the public square. While some conservatives insist that environmental and health regulations are already too intrusive, it's obvious that Mike Huckabee is a conservative of a different stripe. Thanks, Mike Huckabee, for insisting that society has a right to make personal decisions for everyone's life.

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