Hopelessly Out of Touch

When did this happen?

Republicans delight in depicting President Barack Obama as hopelessly out of touch with average Americans, but the decision by the Republican National Committee to hold its winter meeting at a tropical resort is turning the accusation on its head.

I'm not sure I've seen anything remotely out of touch or elitist about Obama, while Republicans have been the party of Wall Street for decades upon decades, while its policy ideas are mired in an imaginary foundation that Reagan supposedly established thirty years ago and serve no practical purpose.  The bible has more relevant answers to our modern problems than these dummies do and the damn thing was written two thousand years ago by desert-dwellers who didn't even know what bacteria was.

So why does it take a dumb trip to Hawaii to turn the "out of touch" meme on its head?  Dude, Republicans were out of touch when Hoover ignored the greatest economic crisis in our country's history and they haven't looked back.  Hell, they still defend Hoover's policies.  Calling Republicans out of touch is like calling Lawrence Welk "old school."  Yet Politico is acting like this is something new.  As if they hadn't noticed that the Republican solution to our economic woes are tax cuts and deregulation for the rich...which also happens to be their cure for healthcare, poverty, crime, and the flu.  In fact, the only time they're not trying to help the rich is when they're helping the super-rich; which is most of the time.  This isn't something new.

But of course, Politico's idea for this is no better.  Sure, Republicans have no practical solutions of any merit as they don't even understand why they need to solve any problems, but...if they could hold their meetings in a crappy place like Baltimore, particularly during crappy weather; the optics would be gold.  And that's what it's all about with these dummies.  Apparently, it was a big negative for Obama to vacation in Hawaii, but now that Republicans are having a "meeting" there, it all evens out.  Finally, the Dems can level the playing field with their Average Joe breathren across the aisle.

And of course, that's where the joke is in all this: The only way the Republican Party could ever look in-touch is by comparison with the nitwit media.  And just in case any of my loyal readers are Baltimorians, I'm sure you have a fine city.  I just thought it was funny the way Politico used Baltimore as if it's the anti-Hawaii; a place so crappy it makes Republican policies more palatable if they're discussed there.  And yeah, the fact that I comfortably wore shorts outside today apparently makes me an out-of-touch elitist who doesn't understand the problems of real Americans.  What a bunch of bozos.

Fact Checking the Fact Checkers

I really like to be told when I'm wrong, as well as seeing things from other perspectives; as that's the only way to really keep on top of my game.  And so I always make a point of reading the "fact check" pieces that Yahoo cites on their frontpage, as a way of knowing if Obama's lying to me.  But unfortunately, they rely upon the Associated Press, which relies upon bozos who have an extremely loose concept of "facts."  Apparently, it took six reporters to find nine items to fact check; little of which would require even minor corrections.

I'm not even going to bother doing a line-by-line fact check of this fact check, as almost every "correction" falls into one of two categories: Correcting claims that Obama never said and pointing out that Congress might not do what Obama wants it to do.  Like when they cite his claim that people can keep their health insurance under his plan, then call him to task because he didn't explain that insurance companies might raise costs or change the plans.  As if he said they wouldn't.

Or when Obama cited Congress's failure to form a Deficit Commission before saying that he's making one of his own; which is "fact checked" because Obama's commission won't be binding on Congress, while Congress's might have been.  And that's it.  It's not that Obama is lying; it's merely that he didn't explain how his commission might be different from the one Congress would have created.

And another time, they "fact checked" him because not everyone agrees that his policies saved two million jobs.  And because the CBO says it can't make such a determination, therefore Obama is wrong...or something.  And that's the weird thing about the fact check, in that they really don't seem to feel comfortable with the concept of facts, and seem to be calling him to task for making any factual claims at all. 

And I suspect that this is really what their big beef is.  It's not that Obama is a liar; it's that he's positing an objective reality, and that simply blows their minds.  Apparently, that's not what they teach in journalism school anymore.  Six reporters.  Six.  And this is the best they can do.  Is it any wonder an extremely unpopular political party can pretend to be masters of the universe when bozos like this are the gatekeepers of truth?

Electables Need Not Apply

A loyal reader recently suggested that the reason Romney won't get a presidential nomination is because he's Republican.  But as I've said before, I really don't see how that's an issue.  These people would vote for Karl Marx if he promised them he'd crush liberals. No, I think Romney's problem is that he just doesn't have any fire in him and comes off a bit flavorless for the hardcore conservatives (and this is a standard by which Mark Sanford is hardcore and flavored).
Part of this is that the RedState-style Republicans like to imagine that they have standards, and so they automatically place Romney as an Establishment goon that they'd never vote for; not because they wouldn't vote for him (they will), but because they like to pretend they have standards. But if Romney talked a better game, he'd woo them over. But the sort of fire-breathing he'd have to do would make him untouchable for anyone else (plus, he just doesn't have enough soul to pull it off), so that just won't happen. And that's a big reason why he'd be a better candidate than any of the jerks these people want
And that's why Obama has little to worry about: The base simply doesn't want anyone sane enough to be electable.  I just wish this was something more apparent to the Dem Establishment. 

The Solution to my Budget Deficit

I've found lately that I just never seem to have enough money.  So I've decided to fix that problem by earning less money, thereby forcing me to spend less.  That's just got to work.

AP Boosts Jindal, Despite Facts

I see the Associated Press continues to relish in its role as Republican propagada machine, with a fluff piece titled Anti-tax stance boosts Jindal despite budget woes.  But who is Jindal's anti-tax stance giving him a boost with?  The article never says.  While the article isn't a total fluff piece, the main gist is that he's really moving ahead, yet fails to say with whom.
It cites his high approval ratings in Louisiana, but those were already high; and are now a little lower than they were last year.  And if that were the case, you'd think the article might have mentioned his actual approval ratings; highlighting how they're now higher because of his anti-tax stance.  But no, many assertions of high approval, but nary a number in sight.  And after fifteen minutes of searching, the best I could find is an article which mentions him having 63% approval rating; though it fails to cite the source for that claim. 

The AP article even suggests that Obama's approval rating of 56% is a "dip"; yet that's only eight points lower than Jindal's rating.  And Obama's approval rating is national, while Jindal's is only for his home state; which is overwhelmingly conservative.  Yet the AP posits this as if this bodes well for Jindal, because he's remaining popular in his state, while Obama's popularity also remains steady.

But perhaps they're talking about a boost with Republicans.  And if they are, you'd think they'd include some sort of statistic to back up that claim.  But again, nothing.  And the latest poll of national Republicans I found showed that only 1% of them would vote for Jindal in a Republican primary; less than the 2% Newt Gingrich received.  Well, that wasn't the latest poll of Republicans, but merely the latest that included Jindal.  A more recent poll in January only included Palin, Romney, Gingrich, and "a candidate from the Tea Party movement."  To Fox News, who conducted the poll, Jindal was less mentionable than a generic candidate from an imaginary movement.  Ouch.

So basically, a half-term governor with no accomplishments, low national recognition, and a looming budget fiasco is getting a "boost," based on his anti-tax policy which deserves partial blame for the budget fiasco.  Brilliant work, AP.  At a time when your profession is becoming increasingly irrelevant, you stick with fluffy analysis pieces that any blogger could have tossed out; assuming they didn't like doing research or including facts.  And if this article has any influence, it'd be to give Jindal the boost that it asserted he already had.  I suspect that this was the point.

Corporate Cash Ain't So Bad

I wrote this on request on a comment from a loyal reader who wanted to know my thoughts on the SCOTUS corporate bribe cash decision, and thought I should just make it a post too.  And yes, I am posting again, now that I'm not doing the brain-intensive work I was doing for the past month or so; though I make no promises.  Frankly, I found no point in writing, as I figure that everything will work itself out; whether I write or not.  But after the panicky week some Dems have had, I suppose maybe I should calm things down.

Overall, I'm not worried. Things tend to balance themselves out, so if things get too out of hand, I figure Congress will step in to fix it. Plus, Dems are actually better for Big Business than Republicans are and I suspect we'll see quite a bit of this cash going to the Dem side. After all, it's not as if Big Money hadn't already infected Democratic coffers or policies. And if this drowns out enough little voices that even the Teabaggers feel impotent, we might find ourselves with the sort of campaign finance system we should have had all along.

And the main dynamic is that Big Business uses campaign cash to bribe Democrats to vote like Republicans, while Republicans extort it from Big Business by denying access to those who don't pay up. Sure, there are some conservative ideologue businessmen who willingly cough it up, but most of them don't give a damn who they give it to, just as long as they win. After all, there's no point in contributing to Republicans if they still can't get more than 30% approval ratings.

As things are, Dem politicos play nice because they still want that cash and lack the backbone to fight the system. But if they get beat up enough by corporate money, I have no doubt they'll finally find their spines.  But I doubt it'll come to that.  Corporate America already supports too many policies which are bad for Corporate America, and the more they let liberals fix our problems, the better it is for everyone.

What Zogby Asks

I randomly get emails to take Zogby's Interactive Poll and just got this question:
If the election for President of the United States were held today and the only candidates were Democrat Barack Obama and Republican Scott Brown, for whom would you vote?


My god, what in the hell is wrong with the media that anyone could possibly imagine this to be a legitimate question?  Had this been one of many similar questions positing different Republican opponents against Obama, this would have been silly.  But Brown was the only match-up they asked about, as if he's some magical Republican hero now that he won a special election against a lousy opponent.  Perspective really isn't the media's strong suit.

Tea Party Money Becomes Irrelevant

The upside to SCOTUS's Corporate Free Speech ruling: The Tea Partiers' money is now irrelevent; thus completing the trifecta.  Their speech was embarrassing, their votes were worthless, and now their money will be drowned out.  For as much as Republicans were paying them lip service, it was certainly for the easy green, as they weren't good for anything else.  And now the GOP can go back to openly worshipping Big Business, rather than merely giving them BJ's in private.

Maybe now we can get better immigration laws, sensible economic policies, and get Corporate America out of the health insurance business; assuming they know what's good for them. 

Rightwing populism is dead!  Long live the Moneybags!

John Edwards is a Douchebag

Wow, I just finished watching President Edwards' resignation speech for a third time and have to say, damn, it sure is too bad he didn't tell us about his lovechild before he won the nomination last year; back when we had a chance to do something about it.  And now that he finally fessed up about how he pressured his aide into pretending to be the baby's father and is handing the reins over to Vice President Lieberman (perhaps yet more mistaken judgment on his part), I've got to say that we're all royally screwed. 

2010 is really shaping up to be a bad year for Democrats.  First Edwards' overly ambitious stimulus bill was killed by Blue Dogs, then his push for single-payer healthcare went down in flames, and now this.  Jesus, who'd have imagined that a president would have been looking up to Bush's lousy approval ratings. 

Seriously though, Clinton lying about having sexual relations with that woman?  Understandable.  And had Lewinsky not been such a blabbermouth or Tripp not been such a witch, it was a smart decision to make.  I would have gone with honesty (or not screwing the intern in the first place), but I understand the decision nonetheless.  But lying about having a lovechild and then having his top aide pretend to be the daddy?  That easily makes Edwards the stupidest douchebag in politics. 

Seriously, how long did he imagine that lie would hold?  Was he really going to avoid seeing his daughter for the first nine years of her life?  That alone would make him Douchebag of the Decade.  "Sorry honey, Daddy wanted to go to your ballet recitals all those years, but I had to be president, so I hired a fake daddy instead.  Hope he was as good as I would have been."  Fucking jerk.

And the rule of lies is that, no matter how bad the truth is, if it'll eventually come out, it's better to just fess up and deal with the consequences.  And if he thought the consequences of having a lovechild would derail his presidential aspirations, then hiring the surrogate daddy to take the fall was much, much worse.  And there's simply no way any rational man would make such an imbecilic decision unless he was a completely amoral fuckface who could only think of himself. 

Praise be to Allah that He gave us Barack Obama instead.  For as bad as 2010 looks (and I daresay I like the way things look), things would have looked a whole heckeva lot worse had Edwards been president.

The Narcissist is "Stripped Bare"

But perhaps I've been unfair in my assessment, so I've decided to give the last word to Mr. Lying Asshole, as excerpted from a formal statement he issued last August.  And remember, this was well after any presidential aspirations had ended, yet his "full responsibilty" is a bit on the light side.  I hope the "apparent father" makes a decent bit of change off his book.  Enjoy!

I was and am ashamed of my conduct and choices, and I had hoped that it would never become public. With my family, I took responsibility for my actions in 2006 and today I take full responsibility publicly. But that misconduct took place for a short period in 2006. It ended then. I am and have been willing to take any test necessary to establish the fact that I am not the father of any baby, and I am truly hopeful that a test will be done so this fact can be definitively established. I only know that the apparent father has said publicly that he is the father of the baby. I also have not been engaged in any activity of any description that requested, agreed to or supported payments of any kind to the woman or to the apparent father of the baby.


It is inadequate to say to the people who believed in me that I am sorry, as it is inadequate to say to the people who love me that I am sorry. In the course of several campaigns, I started to believe that I was special and became increasingly egocentric and narcissistic. If you want to beat me up -- feel free. You cannot beat me up more than I have already beaten up myself. I have been stripped bare and will now work with everything I have to help my family and others who need my help.


I have given a complete interview on this matter and having done so, will have nothing more to say.

Biobrain for Palin

Now working with the Palin people.  Big things happening soon.  More news shortly.  Stay tuned...

Carnival of the Liberals #100: Century of the Nihilist Edition Carnival

Woo doggie, 2009 is coming to an end and I am pleased to announce that, thanks to the courageous efforts of Supreme Leader Obama, as well as you tireless sycophants, liberal nihilism is on the precipice of absolute victory over our empirical arch-enemies, the American Christian.  Now that Obama has completed the trifecta of destruction against America's imperialist healthcare doctrines, as well as the epic success our fellow traveler Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab's had with his recent terror action, which has helped instill fear in flying pants everywhere, I am delighted to announce the introduction to the First Centennial Carnival of the Liberals: Century of the Nihilist Edition Carnival. 

Unfortunately, I'm a bit sketchy on most current events as I took an unscheduled hiatus for the past three and a half months after I found myself at the Secret Nihiliterror Training Seminar and RapeSex Jamboree in beautiful downtown Kenya; which was everything you can imagine it would be.  I mean, really.

For the big finale, they brought the Holy Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, who flagellated himself for three straight hours until the High Holy Mother, Michelle Hussein Obama, came in wearing her traditional Moslem headdress and nothing else and proceeded to make Abdulmutallab a woman while the rest of us took notes.  And it ended in a giant orgy of self-hatred and sinful pain led by Bill Ayers in a Biden mask and we all regretted it immediately afterwards and stalked away in fevered embarrassment for the next several weeks until we forgot why we were stalking.  Needless to say, I haven't had much time for blogging lately.

First Centennial Grand Prize Winner

So without further ado, I announce the Grand Prize winner of the First Centennial Carnival of the Liberals: Century of the Nihilist Edition Carnival, in which we praise The Great O as the One True Savior and place our faith in Him, eternal and always, until death takes away our spirit and returns it to the lands of Obama's fathers where we vow to be their devoted eunuch slaves for all of eternity and forever. 

And leading that eunuch procession for the first hundred years will be none other than our First Centennial Grand Prize Winner, Socratic Gadfly, for his Obamaliscious submission entitled Rahm Emanuel, meet Bill Daley.  It's a real humdinger of praise for the Great and Powerful Obama, and I can't thank Socratic enough for having shared these personal thoughts in honor of our greatest president.  Fortunately for me, the best submission for the carnival also happened to be the only submission for the carnival, as it was so obvious to everyone how immensely superior Dr. Gadfly's post was that no one else bothered submitting anything to me.

So thank you, Socratic Gadfly, for the only submission to the 100th Carnival.  You are truly an Obamafan for the ages.  Please expect two extra ObamaRation shipments later this year, Squire Gadfly, you've earned them.

War On X-Mas Operations

So now what?  That was the only submission I got, but I'm supposed to have nine more of these things.  So in the spirit of Christian Hatred and X-Mas bashing, we turn to Panda's Thumb for a perfect example of subjectivist postmodern lie techniques, in which he makes spurious accusations of hoaxastry against two learned biblical scholars who have uncovered the taxonomic level of the Biblical “kinds” on Noah’s Ark.  Needless to say, allowing scientific tools to aid religious discoveries would be a damning blow against our entire movement and so Panda is doing a thankless task in stifling the work of these intrepid scholars, and we all thank him for it.

And speaking of the use of science as a tool against humanity, we turn to our favorite anti-God Crusader, PZ Myers at Pharyngula, and his smear against the entire country of Italy for daring to sponsor a book which rightly exposes evolution as being the Leninist fad it always was.  PZ even goes so far as to defame the book's author by claiming that he has no expertise in any of the subjects he's discussing, simply because it's true.  Apparently, teaching History of Christianity in Rome isn't good enough to dismiss science anymore.  Good work Dr. Myers, for your use of science as a weapon against God.  For that, you can expect an extra gruel ration in next month's mail, which will be debited from your yearly annual stipend at the adjusted standard rate and applied against any future rents you might soon incur at any time throughout your initial occupancy period; subject to limitations.

And we'll wrap up the science portion of our War on X-Mas Special Feature with a shoutout to the EPA's Climate Change Kid Site, which coaxes children into reporting any environmental irregularities their parents may have committed, by giving them candy when they report violations and beating them when they lie.  While at this State-Approved kid site, you can learn about gay dinosaurs, fantasize about the destruction of the earth, and even face off with Ozone the dog in a game of Hangman!  It's a veritable cornucopia of fear-mongering and anti-capitalism for kids. 

BTW: We plan to make this website mandatory reading for everyone starting January 15, to coincide with the beginning of President Obama Week, so it wouldn't hurt to start brushing up on it now. And remember, the cattle prods have been newly refurbished with larger batteries, so please take good notes.

All Hail Obama!

This is the portion of the carnival in which we praise Obama and all the good things he has done for us, is doing for us, and will do to us.  This portion is now mandatory for all future carnivals and any carnival host who fails to include the All Hail Obama! segment in their respective carnival will be dealt with severely.  And because I truly believe that I'm the most loyal Obama supporter in the world, I am awarding myself with two slots in the carnival, to show my dedication to The One.

Here's a great Nihilist Action Alert I issued after Obama's true birth certificate was brought to a pro-America rally on September 12.  Thanks to my alert, the possessor of the certificate, as well as his immediate family, friends, and acquaintances were all rounded up for a wonderful fourteen week stay at one of Obama's many training facilities in Zimbabwe and never heard from again.  The call of the Mother Country truly is strong for certain people who were once Obama's enemies.  They quickly learn the importance of institutional adherence by the second month and begin to see things in a whole new light soon after.

And if that's not really your thing, then you should try my piece on Obama's Commandos of Love, which provides the true details of the assassination of the martyr Saleh Ali Nabhan last September.  You'll wish you were next on the terror list.

And finally, a large pot of praise from neo-conservative pro-patriot and Community College Associate Professor Donald Douglas and his righteously pro-American essay on Obama's Non-Christmas.  While Dr. Douglas is obviously on the empirical commonsense side of the political spectrum, and therefore doesn't really belong in a liberal carnival, he really nailed us with this one, as it relaly showcases how the Obamas are secretly subverting everything holy and good.  Barack Obama truly is intent on destroying Christmas, in order to replace it with Obamamas, which will be similar to Christmas, except all gifts will be presented to Obama, which will be used to determine the new profession schedules for the next two fiscal years.  Gifts under ten thousand Obamabucks will not be accepted unless accompanied with a letter of explanation, so please don't mess this up.

Obamatime

And lastly, we're giving the biggest and baddest Obama shoutout to the Big Bad Nihilist Himself: Barack Mohamad Hussein Akbar Obama.  That's right, and not just one but three entries directly from the soul of Our Savior, the Holy Oak of History, into your unworthy little brain.

You can visit Our Savior at his official site, Whitehouse.gov, get to be personal friends with Him on MySpace, or read his minute-by-minute thoughts on Twitter; all great ways of getting those demerits removed from your permanent record before they even appear!  But you've got to update often, or Obama won't know if you truly love him. 

And remember, by reading these words you have implicitly sworn allegiance to Obama's Official Privacy Policy and Healthcare Initiatives, which you will receive upon the successful completion of your twelve month training exercises in beautiful downtown Kenya.  Just be sure not to be wearing any underwear when they come to get you, as they find that extremely offensive in their culture and you are very likely to regret that decision almost immediately. 

Good luck, praise be to Obama, and remember, it's better to be watching your neighbors than to be watched by them; so don't let your guard down.  That's the Obama Way. 

All Hail Obama!  Obama for Life!

Political Apathy Strikes Again

I've got bad news for you people: I've gotten so busy lately that I really don't care about politics anymore.  That's right.  My whole CPA thing has kind of taken over my life and I not only don't have time to read political news, I really don't care anymore.  To be honest, I'm not sure why I bothered caring in the first place.  I guess it was just something to do. 

I mean, I've always insisted that politics is just a hobby, which is why political junkies who attack the non-politically minded for not paying attention to politics should get off their high horse and stop calling these people dummies; and now it appears I've joined the dummies.  The only blog I'm even skimming lately is Washington Monthly and I'm barely even doing that.  I just find it so...pointless.

After all, it's not like I ever really imagined that my blog would make some big difference.  I was just in it for the sport; mental exercises to give my brain a work-out.  And these days, I'm really into the work I'm doing for some new clients, which I find far more stimulating than politics (yes, I really do enjoy crunching numbers and no, I don't understand why everyone else doesn't).  Besides, this whole healthcare reform thing has gotten boring to the point of stupidity, while Republicans have gone so far past the point of self-parody that even self-parodies are getting embarrassed and going home.  Overall, I think Obama just made things too easy while driving his opponents so crazy that it really doesn't need any special blogger to point it out.  I could just skim the daily headlines and you could pretty much figure out what I was going to write about.

Does this mean I'm retiring from blogging?  Hell no.  Not only do I plan to keep this thing around for once my current work comes to an end (which it unfortunately will), but I find blog retirements to be totally gay (and not in the homosexual sense).  To announce my "retirement" or whatever would be an exercise in self-absorbed wankery, particularly once I pulled the obligatory comeback once I realized how much I missed the attention. 

No, it's nothing like that.  I'm just trying to explain why I'm not writing much anymore and thinking maybe you should start getting my blog on a news feed, just in case I can think of anything to write.  Hell, I haven't even been reading my comments lately and I see that my Facebook page has seventeen people wanting to be my friend.  Hell, I don't even like Facebook, and now I'm deluged with people trying to weigh me down with social obligations I never asked for.  Not that I have anything against them, it's just that I don't have anything for them either. 

Anyway, stick around and I'm sure I'll regret having written this.  I've often had it that when I write a post saying that I don't have anything to write about, I suddenly start thinking of all kinds of things to write about.  But lately, I just feel like I'm trying to force it and that's really not my style.  I'm a stream of consciousness kind of guy and don't really like the idea of forcing myself to write.  So I guess I'll just end this here and maybe something important will happen and I'll be writing my once-a-day stuff again.

Bigots of the World, Unite!

Is it wrong that I get a certain sense of pride out of this sort of thing?

Swiss voters overwhelmingly approved a constitutional ban on minarets on Sunday, barring construction of the iconic mosque towers in a surprise vote that put Switzerland at the forefront of a European backlash against a growing Muslim population.
[....]
"The minaret is a sign of political power and demand, comparable with whole-body covering by the burqa, tolerance of forced marriage and genital mutilation of girls," the sponsors said.

[....]
Anxieties about growing Muslim minorities have rippled across Europe in recent years, leading to legal changes in some countries. There have been French moves to ban the full-length body covering known as the burqa. Some German states have introduced bans on head scarves for Muslim women teaching in public schools. Mosques and minaret construction projects in Sweden, France, Italy, Austria, Greece, Germany and Slovenia have been met by protests.

Ha!  For as much as some folks like to imagine America to have some monopoly on intolerance, it's nice to see the high and mighty Europeans practicing some good old fashioned hatred for a change.  Yes, a minaret is the same as genital mutilation.  Fricking morons. 

And yeah, while I'm completely ashamed that there are such intolerant bastards in the world, it's just nice to have a little reminder that they're not all limited to my own country.  And hell, maybe this sort of news might somehow permeate into the conservative mindset and they might actually become more tolerant of internationalism. 

First, they accept Swiss and French bigots, and before you know it, they'll start accepting bigots of all races, colors, and creeds.  And in the end, they'll long for the opprotunity of having a One World Congress which permits them to outright oppose the one true enemy: Liberals.  Baby steps, people.

Gingrich Strikes Again

I now know someone who is being swindled by Newt Gingrich's American Business Defense and Advisory Council malarky.  He even bragged about how he'd be getting a replica of Newt's gavel.  I honestly wanted to tell him what a scam it was, and how they'll offer it to anyone who's willing to give them money, but the guy was so excited that I didn't have the heart to tell him.  The best I could do was muster a mild "wow, yeah" which didn't require me to lie.  Even hearing him tell the lady on the phone how evil Obama is wasn't enough for me to want to burst his bubble. 

I'm really much too kind of a person.  Or perhaps that's cowardice, I'm not sure.  Either way, I decided to let him have his fun and pray that he never decides to discuss politics with me.  He really is a nice guy and I'm quite certain that I'd destroy him in a debate.  That's a problem with life: The good guys don't want to rub it in, while the bad guys won't stop even when they're wrong. 

And besides, if giving Newt money makes this guy feel better and he thinks he can afford it, then who am I to burst his bubble?  Besides, that same money could have been used for evil, like giving it to an actual politician who might use it to hurt Democrats; rather than lining Newt's slimy pockets, so I guess that's a plus too.

Party Like It's 1994

Via Atrios, we get more clueless political commentary, this time from CQ Politics:

A lack of competitive open-seat House races in 2010 could complicate Republican efforts to fully maximize a favorable national environment and make large seat gains after back-to-back elections where the political winds were blowing in the opposite direction.

So far, 18 members have announced they are not seeking re-election in 2010 and are running for other office — but only six of those races are currently considered competitive. No member has yet announced an outright retirement, which is unusual; at this point in the 2008 cycle, 14 members had announced their retirement and five others were running for Senate.

And first off, as Atrios asks, what current favorable national environment are they talking about?  Yes, the conservative base is in an anti-Obama frenzy, but seeing as how they're all scary freaks, I fail to see how this is a good thing for Republicans.

And another thing, the article is misleading in that they mean to say that only six of the eighteen are Democratic districts, while the other twelve are open seats for Republican districts.  In fact, based upon what it says elsewhere in the article, there are currently only three open seats in Democratic districts that are competitive for Republicans.  Three.  The basis for CQ's entire article rests upon three seats.  Meanwhile, it mentions three Republican seats that Dems might easily pick up.

In other words, twice as many Republicans are retiring as Democrats, and both sides look like they can easily poach three seats from the other.  And from this, we're to imagine that the political winds strongly favor Republicans and it's 1994 all over again; all evidence to the contrary.

Twelve is Bigger than Six

But even by the standards of the article, if only six of eighteen open election seats are competitive for Republicans, that would kind of indicate a bad thing for Republicans, as it would be an indicator that they're not very popular.  And seeing as how this follows up five special elections this year in which Democrats won open seats, including a traditionally Republican district in New York, there would seem to be some indication that things aren't doing so well for Republicans.  And when you throw in the long series of polls which show Republicans in the basement, it appears that Republicans are still relying on smoke & mirrors to appear strong and are set to lose their third straight election.

The article mentions the high number of retirements in 1994 and 2008, without understanding that the reason for the high number of retirements was because incumbents felt weak.  The political climate caused the retirements; it wasn't coincidental to them.  And conversely, if there are few retirements, it would indicate that incumbents feel strong.  Even in the section I quoted above it mentions that this is a much different retirement situation than in 2008, in which nineteen Congressional retirements had been officially announced by this point, while none have been announced this year.  And again, that would be a bad sign for Republicans and indicate that the political winds do not, in fact, favor them.

Yet the CQ article seems to see these as unrelated events, as if it's purely bad luck that Republicans aren't very competitive.  Of course they're popular, because they say they're popular; too bad voters don't seem to realize it yet.  And for as much as Republicans in the article insist that 2010 will be another 1994, anyone paying attention knows that these people always think it's 1994.

And of course, even the victory of '94 was vastly overrated.  Not only have Republicans not recovered from the excesses of their hubris, but they still haven't hit bottom yet.  As a reminder, they had losses in the two congressional elections following '94, despite Republican predictions to the contrary.  Perhaps after another defeat they'll finally enter a true "wilderness" phase and figure out what they're doing wrong.  But more likely, they'll just double-down on the crazy and insist that their luck is changing.

Financing Education

Something is most definitely wrong with our education system.

AISD Superintendent Carstarphen:

If we simply reduced the number of absences by half across the district, excused and unexcused, I could generate $20 million.

This isn't how things should work.

Commentary

There are too many gunmen.

Instant Expertise

My sister learned everything she needed to know about healthcare reform by reading an op/ed by the CEO of Whole Foods.  I swear to god, that was it.  She favors the removal of all government regulations from health insurance and health care because she's healthy and if everyone took care of themselves like she does, they wouldn't get sick or need insurance.  She just turned thirty, is childless, and hasn't gotten sick in years.  And so her preferred healthcare reform is built around the idea that everyone should be just like her, and if they're not, then it's Darwin time.  What could be easier?  And yes, this is pretty much exactly what she said.

And sure, I'm a bright guy who knows enough about healthcare to poke all kinds of holes into her theory, but no dice.  She just ain't having it.  She read one op/ed by a guy who got lambasted for the ignorance of his op/ed, and that's good enough for her.  Debating an expert like this is a sheer exercise in futility.

In other family news, my dad is still quite insistent that no one has seen Barack Obama's birth certificate and he probably shouldn't be president.  And sure, I offered to show him all the evidence he should need to prove that he's wrong, as we had a computer right next to us while we were talking, but this just angered him and put an end to the discussion.  He's been told by people he chooses to trust that Obama shouldn't be president and that's good enough for him.  People get the experts they deserve.

Terrorist Rampages

Was the shooting at Fort Hood a "terrorist act"?  Sure, I'll agree to that.  But of course, so was Columbine.  And the Virginia Tech killer.  And that guy who shot up the Aerobics class.  These are all terrorist acts.  It's all about powerless people trying to show that they're not as powerless as they seem; and of course, we're all supposed to not notice what it is that gives them their power (Hint: It's guns.).

But how to stop these things.  You can't.  This isn't something you can trace back to a terrorist training camp.  We can't wiretap their minds...yet.  And no number of invasions will make it possible for us to stop these events from occurring.  Rampages happen.  People flip out.  You can't stop the crazy.  I suppose one rational answer would be to limit their ability to obtain weapons of mass destruction, but short of that, there ain't much we can do.  There will always be crazies who kill people.

And this isn't a Muslim thing, or a school thing, and it might not even be a gender thing (though rampaging murderers tend to be male).  The primary issue is that we have an imperfect society that makes certain people feel less powerful than they imagine they deserve.  And they get roped into a warped way of looking at life, that blames everyone else for their own problems.  They are their own worst enemies and project that out upon the world; seeing hatred everywhere because they hate so much. 

And the question isn't why this keeps happening, but why this doesn't happen more often.  Killing people is easy.  And if someone feels pressured into thinking that violence is their only option, then they're going to use violence.  Our goal isn't to make it so that people can't rampage, but rather, to limit the number of these rampages.  And while I do think there are some good things that can be done in this regard, I seriously can't imagine how any of them would come from Joe Lieberman's committee.

The Movie

There is one other alternative to this: Aliens.  Shape-shifting aliens invaded Fort Hood and Hasan was the only one who figured it out and was trying to wipe out the alien menace before they took over.  He killed most of them, but the Colonel stopped him and had him arrested.  It turns out the Colonel is the head alien!  After the arrest, the aliens flood the media with negative news about Hasan, saying that he's an Islamic extremist who hates America; making him the most hated man in the country. 

At some point Hasan escapes and a giant manhunt ensues to capture him.  He's taken in by a group of Klansmen who have temporarily suspended their hatred of non-whites to focus instead on non-humans.  The final battle pits the alien-controlled Fort Hood against all the militias, separatists, neo-confederates, and anyone else with a shotgun.  They come charging in on their pickup trucks, guns blazing.  Hasan leads the charge.  It's a tough battle, interspersed with violence, mayhem, and zaniness. 

Finally, just as it looks as if Hasan is about to be killed by the Colonel, the hottie hillbilly girl kills the Colonel.  Hasan rushes up to her, they look at each other momentarily, then kiss.  Love conquers all.

Oh, and the sequel involves Hasan taking an alien ship back to the home planet, to wipe them out before they wipe us out.  And in the final movie, racial harmony ends after the defeat of the aliens, and race wars break out across the globe.  It turns out aliens are involved in this, and Hasan has to bring the ancient alien ruler to earth, in order to end the assault.  But is he in time...  And yes, I really am too good at this.

Obama: Making Shit Work

It's accepted as a matter of faith that Obama would be happy with any reform bill, so he can claim a victory no matter how shitty it is.  And the idea is that Obama would put politics ahead of policy and be happy to give us a shitty bill.  But that's absolute nonsense.  Because Obama has to live with this bill.  And the shittier it is, the worse the repercussions for him politically.  If he spends all this energy and healthcare gets worse, it's his neck on the line. 

Although many aspects of the reform still won't have started by 2012, we'll still have a good enough idea of how it's working.  And if the bill is considered a failure, they're going to hang it around his neck every chance they get.  And the only way to avoid that is to create a good bill that does what he said he wanted it to do.  And while that still might not be feasible, it's at least more feasible with Obama's technique than it's ever been with anyone else's. 

And so even if Obama is an empty political hack, it would be only natural for him to push as hard as he can for a bill he can live with.  After all, if he was a political coward, he wouldn't have offered to play with this hornet's nest at all.  But once he threw his hat in the ring, he was all-in.  That's the secret of the liberal platform: We have working magic.  We know how to use the government to truly fix problems.  And so the best thing a liberal can do politically is to provide great policies.  As long as we're making shit work, we're golden.