Extremist Kabuki Theater (Or: What to Do in America When You're Bored)

It's a well-known meme among those on the far left that there is no real difference between the Republican and Democratic Parties, and the whole feud between them is some made up event used as an excuse for why both parties support the elite and never get anything real done.

And their evidence of this is that most Democratic politicians don't do more to attack Republicans, but rather, compromise with them in order to get tepid liberal policies. And they're confident that we could get strong liberal policies, if only we attacked Republicans more, refused to compromise on anything, and stopped accepting "minor" liberal policies, like helping the unemployed, improving healthcare, and repealing egregious practices like DADT. 

And we see something similar on the right. Of course, their conspiracy theory is slightly different, as they support the status quo and don't accuse the two parties of collusion.  Rather, they prefer to see moderate conservatives as "weak," as they're not strong enough to sit around, repeating bold cliches on their computers or barstools.  The way they see things, there's a vast liberal conspiracy perpetrated by a small but powerful liberal cabal that uses the liberal media and bribes to minorities in order to prevent America from regaining the glory days that only exists in their minds.

And oddly, this cabal is both rich and anti-rich, establishment and anti-establishment, led by minorities while wanting to keep them down, and wants to destroy America by weakening it so they can continue their dominance in order to help the Chinese, Mexicans, Muslims, Blacks, and any other dirty critter who hates America and wants to see the liberal cabal lose power.  Or...something like that.

Creating Reality In Our Own Image

Naturally, of these two groups, I've certainly got to side with those on the left. Not only do we share many of the same goals, but there is quite a bit of truth to the idea of powerful corporate interests preventing us from creating the policies we need.  And of course, the rightwing side is so entirely nonsensical that it's utterly impossible for one to wrap one's mind around it.

It basically amounts to them being victims besieged from all sides, which can be the only explanation for why things aren't working out better for them. After all, they had been promised that they would be wealthy crime-fighting astronaut cowboys when they grew up, but instead, they're stuck working for a living and wallowing in troubles like everyone else. Clearly, there can only be one explanation for this: George Soros and the Brown People.

But all the same, even the liberals are overstating the problem, as they cherrypick certain undeniable truths in order to simplify the answer. And that answer can only require one thing: Attacking anyone who doesn't agree with them and holding out until they get what they want. And in that aspect, they're identical to far-righties, who also insist upon attacking anyone who doesn't agree with them and holding out until they get what they want.

And that includes disavowing any halfsteps and compromises, while fighting the good fight until the end.  Both sides insist that it's better to get none of what you want than part of it, and if your opponent is willing to compromise, it can only mean you're getting screwed.

Creating Enemies for Fun & Profit

And in that regard, we start to see the real cabal of like-minded interests who pose a kabuki dance of fake fighting in order to get what they want. It's the folks on the far right and left, who insist on standing so firmly on their principles that nothing can possibly get done and they can wage an eternal struggle of good v. evil.  And while they insist that good policies are at the root of their agenda, in practice, attaining such policies is impossible; as it's intended to be.

If they get any good policies at all, it's a side-effect of this struggle, not the purpose. And they'll insist that any policy is an abomination unless it was done in their desired way. And so they continue with their eternal struggle, because their real struggle is with moderation and compromise.  They know that if they're ever allowed to have a real dogfight with their foe, they'll win.  And so they blame anyone who doesn't allow that to happen.

And until the traitors on their own side stop getting in the way, they'll be forced to fight the good fight against people they consider foolish heretics or enemy spies. And to the far-left's chagrin, they have so many people on their side that it's been "watered down" with moderates, while their counterparts on the far-right wield great power within their party and seem to be having all the fun; but only because the party already shed off all the moderates who were watering it down.

And so ironically, righties bask in the glory of a popular movement that's only extreme because it's so small, while lefties gnash their teeth at the weakness caused by their popularity.  But since the ones on the left prefer seeing themselves as a small band of experts fighting for justice, while those on the right cast themselves as part of a large group of Real Americans fighting for America; this is probably for the best on both sides. And the bigger the left gets and the smaller the right gets only pushes them further into their chosen direction, confident that they're doing what is right and holy.

And the end result is that they have a great war to fight, with goals which are as big and bold as they are impossible to attain. And if any victory is won by their side, it will be immdiately forgotten, as the goalposts move further into their intended direction. For them, it's not about winning the war, but having a war to win in the first place. They all know there's a war to fight. They just have to figure out where it is.

Reality Sux

And of course, the truth is far more mundane: Politicians are human and democracy is a popularity contest too often won by selfish, shallow idiots who know how to impress people with money. And because our Founding Fathers wanted to make it difficult for a minority to make drastic changes to our nation, we end up with halfway policies and compromises which reflect a rough average of America's populace as a whole.

And that's a feature, not a bug.  It's good that people disagree.  It's not healthy for a species if we all think alike and move in the same direction.  Herd logic should always be questioned, and we should always be careful about moving too fast at once.  But that's just not something these people like to acknowledge, as it removes evil from the equation and makes the solution too difficult for them to solve on their own.  So they're forced to invent a secret cabal keeping them down, while ignoring any fact that refutes that theory.

And so all-important goals like ending rescission and repealing DADT disappear from the scorecard the very moment we achieve them. Not because they weren't important, but because they undermine the theory of the evil cabal. And they only started believing in this cabal because modern life is incredibly dull and they'd rather see some Grand Scheme pitting their good against their enemy's evil than admit that there really isn't much reason to wake up in the morning other than to pay their bills and feed their pets.

And that's what outrages them most of all. These people don't need an ideologically perfect America. They just need a hobby.  I hope some day they get one, so the grown-ups can focus on getting shit done.  Sorry, people, but it's not about you.  Believe it or not, fixing problems is more important than your ideological purity.  Deal with it.